Wednesday, September 20, 2006


Today during dinner, we had a discussion about (its kinda hard to explain the right topic, i'll try) that after finishing school or studies, whether to take the dream job you always wanted, and the job is so perfect that you would be called a fool if you don't take it and get into the real world or get bonded with the corporate world for years or is there any other way or if i can put it like "not to be bonded by the corporate world for years ahead and work n just work n un-knowlingly fall into the corporate world".

As when we are students, we have tons of time to do things we like (even thou' less money) and we think in an idealistic way and we have our own notion of living our life and we believe we will not fall into the same category as others, n live on our own terms.

A friend of mine "stan - his blog here" wrote a blog entry few weeks ago about something similar like how after starting his work, how things start to change even if you don't want too and one has to play the game. I will quote his post here:
"Everything with you is all about business these days." Ouch.

It was like 2 daggers in my back. Like Jerry Maguire saying "jump into my nightmare, the water is warm". Worst fear came true. I spend so much time in this skin that like Donnie Brasco, "I'm not pretending to be them, I am them." I spend 90% of my time in business casual now, what do you expect? I deal with shady, fucked up, results minded people everyday. They don't give a fuck about you. I grew tough skin, I had to protect myself. I adapted. Picked up a thing here and there about strategic thinking, debate, and aggressiveness that I use to hold my ground now. A slight bit of selfishness have saved my ass many a time from being abused. The nice guy syndrome. And guess what, its worked. Its helped me function better in the corporate environment.

But then I want to peel the skin off, but it sticks. I never really know if its just seeping in. I get a little paranoid and self-conscious.

I picked up alot of idealism in undergrad, but I've been able to use very little in the real world. Once I entered grad school and beyond, I realized the true power and necessity of economic forces. None of us can escape from this force. All of us must make payments, put food on the table, support the family etc. We all work to make ends meet. Idealism has to wait a little now while I deal with the realities of how I'm going to save enough to put a down payment on a house. And while I think through how best to invest my time and money everyday. The reality of adult life is that no one cares and no one is going to help you, therefore to obtain a slice of that dream you thought you were entitled to since high school, you have to help yourself. And so I work, and skin gets tough. But the people out there are tougher.

"You've changed."

Maybe a little, but not much. Most of me is the same, I just have a better way of dealing with the outside world. Growth is also change, maturation is also change, and those are positive things - it means I'm developing as an individual, into an adult. Change is the only constant in the universe. Allow me to cite evolution as an example. Change is a function of time, and time stops for no one. I'm old enough to know who I am, and those that know me know I am extremely value and principle driven. Those will never change.

A lot of us probably think like him including me and I cudn't have said it better myself. Even thou' I think I won't fall into this or change but as he says, one does and its for good if you take it positively but also somethings will never change in me.

So my friend with whom I had this discussion, I hope you (me too) fulfill all your dreams before we all fall into this change n also change our dreams.

Finally - Have a great life ahead Nil - farewells are always hard - but we will meet again :)


room for thoughts said...

Unfortunately very, very true. I'm experiencing it every day...

Stanley said...

hey mohan, nice entry here. i remember about 1 yr ago was when i was out there. hope u are doing well!